Dear Hummingbird #2: the ceaseless conundrum of managing a regular college with CA

Life is “understood backward; but it must be lived forward” ~ Søren Kierkegaard

Illustration by dinosandcomics

Question:

Dear Hummingbird,

#I am preparing for inter exams. Managing offline college and society work with inter preparation is becoming too difficult. I think inter prep is suffering the most. In my college societies are given too much importance. I am in the core cabinet there and it takes away a lot of time. I don't want to leave the society and I don't want to sacrifice my inter prep either. What should I do which actually makes an impact on my time management? Schedules etc don't work beyond 2-3 days for me.

— Depends on mood

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Answer : Everyone is just winging it

Dear Depends on mood,

When I left college, one of my seniors sent a mail to all the society members and here it is:

The world out there is interested more in people who have seen a lot of things and done a few of them. Make mistakes, go for that extra leap, do whatever you want but try it. Give it a shot. You never know that you could do it unless you actually do it. Get ahead with mainstream and go for that not-so-ordinary but be clever while deciding about it. The best thing about all this is you get to do these with people of your choice unlike in corporates therefore you will make friends for life. This is actually the best thing that your college will give you. Enjoy every moment with your friends and college for that is the only thing you will miss the most. Have no regrets. And and and, please go for as many trips as possible. They will go out as the best in your memory lane.  

One humble request that I am making to you all is don't compare yourself EVER with anyone around you. You all are very unique and have tremendous potential. Everyone has their own timezone. You only need to invest your time in RIGHT things. If ever you know that you are doing wrong, please don't go ahead with it no matter how tempting it may sound/look. Get out of your comfort zone and kick your ass to rocket to the sky.

I keep revisiting this mail whenever I feel low in life. As soon as I read your question, it made me dip back into all those memories, the cold winters in college lawns, binge-watching shows without any guilt, the luxury of not knowing where you will be after 3 years and yet surviving happily in that uncertainty.

I envy you for that luxury but I am grateful that I lived my part of it. Let’s get one thing clear - managing a regular college with a professional course is CA is soul-suckingly mentally exhaustingly difficult. (can’t even spell correctly when I think about it)

You know what is the secret though? How are so many people able to do it?

Here’s the recipe:

Everyone is winging it, some just do it more confidently. ~ Pamela Druckerman

Everyone wakes up with a gazillion things in their to-do list, they skip breakfast, mourn at attending classes, they are late to meetings, you will see them sleeping at the back of the class or casually flipping ‘Law’ notes- hiding it in the desk while the teacher is teaching economics, the pressure of college internals + assignments + tutorials + the impending fear of IPCC keeps them awake at night and YET THEY SURVIVE.

Sometimes what we need is not a solution to a problem but validation that you are going in the right direction and it’s not easy. That’s all I have to offer.

I can also give you a prescription of things other than time management and productivity hacks that helped me not lose my sanity (there is enough advice on to-do’s on the internet)

Talk to your mates - if you hold a cabinet position, talk to other members. Explain your situation, ask them if they can give you a leeway for a couple of months, tell them the situation you are facing. Give them clarity on what you can deliver. Make it up to them after your exams.

Sit down and list down your priorities - immediate, short-term and long-term. Categorize them. See what you want to focus on first and what means to you the most in the long run, focus on that. You are not a loser if you don’t do everything.

If a cabinet position is only boiling hindrances for you, you need to get out of the kitchen. Look around, find compassionate people, join organisations outside college, connect with non-CA aspirants, try and look at the world through their eye. Try and pick up activities that don’t hinder your schedule.

While a lot of people talk about time management they don’t talk about energy management. Like you portion your day into tasks, analyse how much energy it takes out of you, organizing society events is much more exhausting than sitting at your desk and studying, you need to be mindful enough to not invest too much energy so as to have nothing for your first priority i.e. CA.

Don’t think about being perfect, nobody is. Just try to be enough.

Attend just enough meetings. Just enough classes. Just enough assignments. Just enough society work. Just enough chilling and travelling.

The only key to managing all this is not to overboard with one task. Say ‘No’ when you need to. (I wish you don’t say 'no’ to a lot of parties though)

Trust me what you will remember after you pass out is all those fond memories of travelling, eating junk without being bothered about it, exploring new places, falling in love, pursuing your passion and so much more. Feel grateful!

The things that you learn in college will help you for a long time. You will see pieces of it in everyday life - I call it disguised learning. Because you send a lot of sponsorship mails, you would be much better at drafting emails, team management skills, communication in general - all of it will be subsumed as a part of your personality. Don’t underestimate it.

Experience one beautiful thing a day. However small. However trivial. Read a poem. Play a favorite song. Laugh with a friend. Gaze at the sky just before the sun’s final tumble toward night. Watch a classic movie. Eat a slice of lemon drizzle cake. Whatever. Just give yourself one simple reminder that the world is full of wonders. Even if we are at a point in life where we can’t appreciate things, it sometimes helps to remember there are things in this world to enjoy, when we are ready. ~ The Comfort Book by Matt Haig

All this struggle, all those sleepless nights will make sense some day and you will thank yourself for going through it. Life makes sense in hindsight.

As the OG philosopher Nietzsche said ‘what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger’. However…..If it is killing you, resign. If CA is your priority and you know you will not have time for anything else or you are just another person that needs more time to absorb things - RESIGN and don’t feel guilty about it. You are just making a trade-off.

I know and I understand you worked hard for that position but you know what

MENTAL PEACE »»»»»»»» every damn thing

Start making decisions for yourself. Adulting is waiting for you next door.

Illustration by Maurice Sendak

Warmly,
Hummingbird

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Dear Hummingbird is a syndicated advice column by CA aspirants for CA aspirants.

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